I wanted to write my year-end article more for myself than anything else. While I am trying to practice not looking back too much, I thought it would be good to capture just what a year it has been.
That said, thanks to my mindfulness practices, I no longer feel compelled to pinpoint the year along a continuum of Shitty to Fabulous.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not like I’ve mastered the Zen arts of balance, but I think I have improved my ability to release the attachment and emotions to things that happen in my life.
Improved, not conquered.
Anyway, I thought a recap for myself would be good. So that I can look back and laugh / roll my eyes about 2022 in time to come.
Actually, I just re-read my 2021 Recap article and I’m laughing (ironically) now. Boy, did I not expect the truckload of shit that hit me since March this year.
Just Can’t Hit It.
So I wrote it. But here’s the conundrum. While this is my personal blog and I have a right to write about my feelings (and they have a right to exist), I can’t seem to hit publish on that piece.
Because it is obvious who the subject of my piece is and they may read it and… well, I guess I just don’t want any additional worry or anxiety about reactions, said or unsaid.
So, I am compelled to cut out all the “highlights” and simply brandish 2022 with the word INTENSE and write about coping and the future instead.
I guess it makes for an easier read for all of us time-and-attention starved folks, anyway.
(The unfiltered version can float blissfully in the cloud).
I don’t see the issues having a full stop. So all I can do is do what I do to protect my own mental wellbeing.
How I Coped:
I built them tall and wide with regard to this situation. I can help with what I can and what I wish to. I did not explain the boundaries, I just started executing them.
People will get the drift eventually.
The daily meditations helped a lot, as did trying to shift perspectives on matters and telling that chatterbox in my head to shut up.
Walks and wines helped too.
(The anger management still needs work).
I continued connecting with those who wished to do the same with me. I gave up chasing after others.
4. Chose fun.
From writing and releasing music, to performing at our very 1st gig, to all those moments with friends, to slaying our 1st holiday since Covid started, I laughed. A lot.
And what of 2023?
My hubby told me that next year onwards, I really need to prioritise what I want to work on. And to reduce being sucked into the never-ending drama.
I agree with him.
- I know that in 2023, I want to finally write that book, or two, that I have been talking about for a while.
- Have fun wining, dining and building stronger connections with my “friends fam”.
- Have shorter and more frequent escapades.
- Record a couple more songs with the musician who lives with me.
- Perform with him and the others who make up our collective.
- Continue my work as a mental health advocate.
- And, continue on my own mental and physical wellbeing journey.